You know those days when you have to pull yourself up by your bootstraps and Get 'er done?
Ever have one of those days?
IT was gonna be a HARD day.....
When I have to DECIDE to get up and run in the morning and it feels a whole lot harder than sleeping in. When smiling with my eyes is a choice. Sometimes, it is an act of will to not curl into a ball and shut out the world, even if just for a minute. Those are the days...... When focusing on a dear friend's triumph is a mental act, initially so much harder than the cute pity party I rsvp'd for. The days that it feels like a miracle when research is done, and bookkeeping stats entered, when the budget is reconfigured and all bills paid, when one more client contact is made before my sleepy head hits the pillow, when I spend time with me and for me even though my list is mocking from my phone..... oh God, some days it is HARD to be intentional about each step I make.
I don't always have these days. But they are there. Yes. They. Are. Days when it feels like I am on the bench press and the weights are bigger than I can handle. When all the grunting and puffing and pushing in the world isn't budging the bar. I remind myself that I am creating NEW habits. And new habits are hard. Shoot.
Isn't that the part of habit building that is usually glazed over? The hard part?
"21 days, people. Kill the old one and start a new one. Only 21 days, you can do it." All of a sudden it sounds glamorous... and glamorous is so very attainable. We tell ourselves, "sure it'll be hard..but its ONLY 21 days.... I can do that. Look at Jennifer Hudson, she did it." This Guy says ( and backs it up with a STUDY) that it actually takes 66 days. - shudder - He also says that it doesn't have to be hard. Take all info with a grain of salt, skeptics!
We grow up creating habits. They are conscious, sub conscious, automatic and and thought through, it is the way we eat, the way we think, the way we act, the way we sleep, the way we get angry or react to being ill...... Changing them is like changing our name. Magnetically, we are drawn back to the course which we know all too well. To the familiar.
A 180 degree change is next to impossible. It is hard to walk a foreign road, blindfolded, not knowing when a stone or a branch will hinder progress. When I find myself careening to the ground, my brain panics and I wonder... will my same coping mechanisms soften my fall? They don't, the stitches in my forehead are clear on that fact!
I look at people who "have it all" and I realize that we never see the whole picture. Somewhere in the darkness of their bedroom or bent over, gasping for air in the privacy of their backyard they made a decision to keep moving. To walk and not sit. To focus on the goal and not the current dilemma.
I think if I ever write a book (which I won't) I will explore the agony of progress. It is where I am right now. Realizing the pain of success. Knowing it is worth it. Yes, it is. And it hurts so good. (thanks, John Mellencamp for your words of wisdom and encouragement)
I tell myself:
"no progress is ever made with out biting your knuckles and pushing through." Pretty lame, eh? But I bite my knuckle and push through. Most days. I remind myself that NO ONE ever got where they were going by giving into the voices that scream, "QUIT!"
Ultimately, I want to explore, find, realize and experience my essence...And that takes strategy and intentionality and, sad to say, pain. For me, it will be a commitment to the death. Maybe a slow silent death. Maybe a loud, fighting battle. Maybe both. But I am committed to accessing my essence through self awareness, self discipline, laughter, running, journaling, self control and acceptance of pain. Oh, and many talks on the porch with my hubby accompanied by an ice cold beverage.
Aware that my essence is complicated, I am prepared that it's gonna take some time...
Who's with me?
In it to win it.
Ever have one of those days?
IT was gonna be a HARD day.....
When I have to DECIDE to get up and run in the morning and it feels a whole lot harder than sleeping in. When smiling with my eyes is a choice. Sometimes, it is an act of will to not curl into a ball and shut out the world, even if just for a minute. Those are the days...... When focusing on a dear friend's triumph is a mental act, initially so much harder than the cute pity party I rsvp'd for. The days that it feels like a miracle when research is done, and bookkeeping stats entered, when the budget is reconfigured and all bills paid, when one more client contact is made before my sleepy head hits the pillow, when I spend time with me and for me even though my list is mocking from my phone..... oh God, some days it is HARD to be intentional about each step I make.
I don't always have these days. But they are there. Yes. They. Are. Days when it feels like I am on the bench press and the weights are bigger than I can handle. When all the grunting and puffing and pushing in the world isn't budging the bar. I remind myself that I am creating NEW habits. And new habits are hard. Shoot.
Isn't that the part of habit building that is usually glazed over? The hard part?
"21 days, people. Kill the old one and start a new one. Only 21 days, you can do it." All of a sudden it sounds glamorous... and glamorous is so very attainable. We tell ourselves, "sure it'll be hard..but its ONLY 21 days.... I can do that. Look at Jennifer Hudson, she did it." This Guy says ( and backs it up with a STUDY) that it actually takes 66 days. - shudder - He also says that it doesn't have to be hard. Take all info with a grain of salt, skeptics!
We grow up creating habits. They are conscious, sub conscious, automatic and and thought through, it is the way we eat, the way we think, the way we act, the way we sleep, the way we get angry or react to being ill...... Changing them is like changing our name. Magnetically, we are drawn back to the course which we know all too well. To the familiar.
A 180 degree change is next to impossible. It is hard to walk a foreign road, blindfolded, not knowing when a stone or a branch will hinder progress. When I find myself careening to the ground, my brain panics and I wonder... will my same coping mechanisms soften my fall? They don't, the stitches in my forehead are clear on that fact!
I look at people who "have it all" and I realize that we never see the whole picture. Somewhere in the darkness of their bedroom or bent over, gasping for air in the privacy of their backyard they made a decision to keep moving. To walk and not sit. To focus on the goal and not the current dilemma.
I think if I ever write a book (which I won't) I will explore the agony of progress. It is where I am right now. Realizing the pain of success. Knowing it is worth it. Yes, it is. And it hurts so good. (thanks, John Mellencamp for your words of wisdom and encouragement)
I tell myself:
"no progress is ever made with out biting your knuckles and pushing through." Pretty lame, eh? But I bite my knuckle and push through. Most days. I remind myself that NO ONE ever got where they were going by giving into the voices that scream, "QUIT!"
Ultimately, I want to explore, find, realize and experience my essence...And that takes strategy and intentionality and, sad to say, pain. For me, it will be a commitment to the death. Maybe a slow silent death. Maybe a loud, fighting battle. Maybe both. But I am committed to accessing my essence through self awareness, self discipline, laughter, running, journaling, self control and acceptance of pain. Oh, and many talks on the porch with my hubby accompanied by an ice cold beverage.
Aware that my essence is complicated, I am prepared that it's gonna take some time...
Who's with me?
In it to win it.
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