Coffee (from my new french press, baby)and my blog. I cannot wait to write right now. It is anticipation of an old friend.

I had a 5 person panel interview today, a second one and if they "like" me a third one will be scheduled for next Wed. I have never come away from an interview feeling like I might not have been at the top of my game. Not that I did poorly....I just had a sense that I was lacking in some way. Which can be a bit disconcerting. As an individual not easily rattled the very fact that I was disconcerted is disconcerting.

(as earnestly I was craving written expression, the words are hard to come by today)

Baby boy took almost an hour and a half to settle for nap. It broke my mothers heart. Why baby? I kept checking on him, got him up for twenty minutes and played with him, still he cried. Hard. I knew I had to remain stoic, let him cry it out. He was fed, warm, changed, and sleepy. He has been throwing temper fits of late and I had the strange feeling that this was a control episode.... a 17 month old testing his power. At each discreet check he was rolling around his crib, eyes closed, crying. I feel like I approach my life like that sometimes. A silent temper fit inside me when something is out of my control. It takes me awhile to regain peace and a baseline of normalcy. Seeing the same my toddler made me cringe and recognize a need to mature.

Hot chocolate is being sipped by my girls as they giggle after school. I am going to join the mayhem and relish being their mom.